Today's Weight: 189.0 lbs! NEW LOW!
5-Day Average: 190.34 lbs
After reading a couple of blogs (Billy's, Ripx, and Kristen's) I thought I'd weigh in on my thoughts about what I'm going through. In late January, early Feburary I decided to change my life so that I wouldn't end up like the dude in the picture above. I know I was a far cry from getting there, however, with my eating and drinking habits with a lack of exercise I could have been there in 5 years. Although I'm ultimatley responsible for all of what I have done, I know I wouldn't have been able to do it without the help and support of FAT. I didn't have any support system set up in my personal life so I thank all of you that have either blogged about it (because even if I haven't commented on it I probably have read it), and espcially those that have commented on my blog. It seemed as though everytime I needed to get my ass kicked someone was there to say it, and when I need support I got it too. Okay, that got a little off topic, but I wanted to let you all know how much you've helped me.
Now to what I was talking about at the very beginning. Rip was talking about how he felt as though he didn't earn his new low weigh-in in his latest blog. I can totally relate to this, because I have felt as though I haven't earned any of my new lows in quite a while. I'd say since I was about 200-205 area. I think this has to do with the change in perspective most of us have once we have achieved some goals that we thought were unattainable. I started out going to the gym 6x a week, eating the same shit everyday so I knew exactly what my calories were, and then not drinking, not hanging out with friends, pretty much being uber-obsessed with my regiment. I was able to keep this up for about 2 months maybe 3 and then I slowed it down. I think if I tried to keep going at the pace I was I would have ended up regressing and just throwing in the towel. I was going balls to the wall, 100% of the time...beating myself up when I slipped up and hating the way I looked.
Now that I have gone away from that mentality, my brain is telling me that I'm not doing enough to earn my new low weigh ins. The fact of the matter is, even though I'm okay with missing a workout here and there, or not eating 100% clean all the time, I'm still going at a pretty good pace. I usually workout at least 4x a week, two strength training days (in which I still run a mile, and do 20 min of cardio) and two cardio days (run a mile, and do 20-30 min of HIIT). I will occasinally get 5 workouts in (another day of strength training). Another factor to why I might feel as though I'm not earning it is because I've become much more efficent in my workouts. I can get a better workout in about 30-45 min now, when I was going for 1-2 hours before. So, I'm not spending as much time in the gym anymore and that might be messing with my head. When I first started I couldn't run for a mile straight, in high school I couldn't run a mile in under 11 min, probably 12...yesterday I ran a mile in 7:30, not blazing fast but in comparison it's awesome.
I eat very clean for the most part. I hardly ever have sugar! I don't eat a lot of processed foods, I haven't been to fast food in ages! I plan most of my meals, they might not be specific plans but I know what type of food I want to eat and when, and approx how many calories.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I, like some others, am struggling with changing from gung-ho weight loss dude, into weight-loss dude that wants to have a life but is still always conscience about what he is doing and what he is putting into his body. I think Ripx does deserve his new lows, I think I deserve my new lows because when you look at the big picture Rip...you could have done a whole lot shitter than you did over the weekend, but you made an effort to control yourself and you did a great job.
I really hope that this blog isn't coming across like "look how good I am" or "I doing so good, I'm going to slow down"...because it's not. I don't think I'm ever not going to feel like I'm the fat guy....so, I think for the rest of my life I'm always going to be struggling with my weight, I just hope I'm struggling with it in the 175-185 range opposed to the 260+ range...
5 comments:
Thanks for the props man and for the other way of looking at things. I think for me I get scared when I allow some bad food to sneak in. It's a real slippery slope for the Ripmyster. I have lost 20-30 pounds a gazillion times to fall back into the same trap. I know I cant go 100% all the time and that once I am in better shape it will be easier to maintain. I just don't want to let one crack in the dam flood all my effort as I have done in the past. I too will probably mentally always be a fat man. Even when I was 165 I thought I was fat. I guess in a sense I was skinny fat. I hope with time as I heal my body I will also heal my mind. Billy's blog and Ryan Browns attack of my points really stirred up a shit storm in my head. I don't usually get pissed and pop off like that as I am sure you know. He just really hit a nerve for me. Anyway I suppose this is all off topic in a way. I am stoked that you can loose weight and normalize all at the same time. You continue to set the bar.
I'm afraid I don't have anything insightful to add to this FAT Coalition-wide conversation now, but I will say this:
Dude, you're ten pounds away from your goal weight! That's awesome!
I think that we all have different phases that we go through. We all just have to find our own balance. Sometimes I need to go just do something, anything. Other times I need to go all out (I'm entering this phase right now). However, it's nearly impossible to go all out all of the time.
This is pretty much going to be a life-long struggle for probably all of us in this group. Ripx is right about the slippery slope. It's right around the corner. That's why I'm always looking to lose 10 lbs. I don't need to, but it always has to be in my sights so that I don't gain 10 lbs (and then 10 more, etc...).
If you're losing the weight, you're clearly doing something right. You deserve it. You're making sacrifices that some of us (*cough*me*cough*) have forgotten we need to make.
You deserve this, man. You're doing great!
BTW, those are amazing pics from your last post. Wow, what a difference!
If you keep loosing weight at such a fast pace it wouldn't take long before there was nothing left of you! :P
I think that we must re-evaluate our goals from time to time. Weight loss is one goal as is eating right, building strength, flexibility, agility, endurance, etc. It take a different type of focus and plans for each of these. Not just that but realize that building muscle and losing weight are pretty hard to do at the same time.
I can see that you're getting to the point where weight loss isn't as high a goal as living healthy at a decent weight. I think that's a good thing. How do you normalize after working so hard to lose weight? I've never given it any thought but maybe I should.
Good progress, Jason. Those pics really show it.
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